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What If You Assumed Every Interaction Was For The Long Term?

31/1/2017

 
What if you assumed every interaction was for the long term?  How would that affect your actions?
 
That guy who cut you up in his car.  That lady that won’t move out of the way on the pavement.  That annoying person at work in a different department.
 
An assumption of a one-time interaction gets you off the hook.  It allows you to vent from a place of emotion as there are few consequences.
 
What if the guy in the car was your boss?  What if that lady was your grandma?  The annoying person at work the one person you need to unlock a new project?
 
“If you ran into an asshole in morning, you ran into an asshole.  If you run into assholes all day, you’re the asshole” ~ Fictional character Raylan Givens in TV series Justified – from Tools of Titans by Tim Ferriss

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How Long Does Personal Development Last?

30/1/2017

 
​Should we be taught to eternally study?
 
Lifelong learning is surely a habit worth pursuing.  It is especially difficult to muster the energy to self-learn after school has beaten all enthusiasm for learning out of its pupils.  To learn for the sake of doing rather than for the sake of a test.
 
How long should this last?  What should we study?
 
Seneca would say:
 
“You should keep learning as long as you are ignorant, - even to the end of your life” and himself quotes a proverb: “As long as you live, keep learning how to live.”

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Weekend App Recommendation - Headspace

29/1/2017

 
Headspace: Guided Meditation and Mindfulness

There are lots of apps on meditation and mindfulness, but the one that I have found the easiest to get into a habit with is Headspace.

I found some other apps quite difficult to start due to the long silences (I know this is the point of meditation).  But when starting I found it useful to be guided along what I was meant to be thinking. Headspace seems to prompt me at just the right moment where my mind starts to wander.

Give it a try - the first 10 days are free:

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If You Are Good Enough To Lead, Why Are You Working For Someone Else?

28/1/2017

 
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It might be an old saying, but I think I heard it from Johnny Dzubak.
  • “If you play the guitar, you better learn to sing or else you will be at the mercy of an asshole lead singer your whole life.” 
​Expanding that thought:
  • Even better, learn to write songs so you won’t be at the mercy of a producer
  • Even better, start your own label so you won’t be at the mercy of a record company
 
Thanks to the internet the barriers to entry to do this have come crashing down.  And you can do it in any field you want.  Be a creator.  The excuses have gone.
 
Corporate Translation:
  • If you are a professional, learn to manage or else be at the mercy of a task master
  • If you are a manager, learn to lead or else be at the mercy of implementing others ideas
  • If you are good enough to do both, then why are you working for someone else?

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On Empathy Or: Why Are You Such A Jerk All The Time

27/1/2017

 
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Once you have done something, it cannot be undone. 

The only thing in your control is either to try to repeat what you have done or try to do something different next time. 

​This is easy to remember for ourselves.  More difficult is to realise this of others right at the moment of your reaction to their actions.
 
Remember “We judge ourselves by our intentions.  And others by their actions.” Steven R. Covey

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On Worrying

26/1/2017

 
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​Meetings are likely the biggest time waster in your working life.  But in your whole life, the biggest time waster must be worrying.  Not living in the present.
 
Seneca says it better than I,
 
“But what is greater madness than to be tortured by the future and not to save your strength for the actual suffering, but to invite and bring on wretchedness? If you cannot be rid of it, you ought at least to postpone it. Will you not understand that no man should be tormented by the future?”
 
Worrying is the poison of the mind.  Mindfulness and habits are the antidote. 

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Two Decisions To Make Early In Your Adult Life

25/1/2017

 
​Two decisions to make early on in your adult life:
 
If you already had enough money so that you no longer needed trade your time for money (e.g. work a salaried job), what would you do with both?

  1. What would you do with your time? 
  2. What would you do with your money?
 
If you do not know the answer to these beforehand, then chances are you will waste both when you get them.

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Why This Year (And Every Year) Should Be The Best One Ever

24/1/2017

 
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​Everyone was saying 2016 was terrible because:
  • lots of celebrities died
  • Trump got elected
  • we voted for Brexit
  • the £ lost value because of Brexit
  • the £ gained value because Brexit has not happened yet
 
None of the above made any material impact on my day to day life. If I hadn't watched the news I would be hard pressed to tell something had changed.
 
It is easy to watch the news, regurgitate how bad things will be, prophesize about the next thing to worry about.  If you don't then you are stupid, right?
 
I think I had quite a lot to deal with last year and still I do not think 2016 was bad despite:
- I lost over £4k in my first business venture
- my wife took a leave of absence due to work related stress
- my dad was diagnosed with two types of aggressive inoperable cancer (and almost died from infection)
- a close friend of the family died of cancer
- even my hedgehog died of wobbly hedgehog syndrome.
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But this was still the best year ever.  I have been having the best year ever since 2005.  This is when I made the choice to both appreciate what I have and consistently strive for better.
 
Since then, I have travelled the world in holiday sized chunks; increased by salary by 200%; met my soulmate and got married; and got in the best shape of my life.
 
What a waste of energy and time thinking that a whole year was bad and hoping that the next one will be better.  Hope is not a good strategy.  Do something to make your life better.  Your relationships, your tithing, your community, yourself.
 
And then maybe you will find that everything is okay.  Just as it has been all the time.  Turns out you have not practiced enough gratitude to notice yet.
 
If you are not sure what to be grateful for then maybe you need to recalibrate your give-a-shit-ometer. If you need any more reasons to be grateful:
 
· If you don't live in Aleppo and/or are not in mortal danger.
· If you can read this on the internet realise the majority of people on the planet cannot.
· If you can stream any documentary or read any book instantly on your iPad realise you have access to more knowledge than any other generation that has ever lived on the planet
 
This is the best time to live and we are convincing ourselves it isn't. Let's get a grip humans!
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At What Point Are You Going To Care If You Are Enjoying Life?

23/1/2017

 
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At what point are you going to care if you are enjoying life?
 
Watching Eden on All 4 earlier in the year, where a group of people are segregated from the rest of society for a year.
 
A question struck me, when are they going to allow themselves to enjoy their time there? After a day, a month, after 3 months?
 
At the start, it is easy to assume that hard work is needed.  Chopping wood, building shelter, gathering food.  But at what point is it okay to take a break? At what point is it okay to not work 12 hours a day manual labour.
 
The people doing all the manual labour were getting angry at those not "pulling their weight".  They already had shelter and someone decided to make more shelter. They already had a way of cooking and dividing food and someone wanted to improve it.
 
If you don't get your priorities sorted early, then what are you chasing?  Or running away from?
 
The people not “pulling their weight” have “excuses”.  “I don't know how to do it”.  “I'm not as strong as you”.  And some of those excuses are valid reasons.
 
Why fight to be good at someone else’s strengths when you are never going be as good as that person. Because they want you to? Because they are angry at you?  Because they are more forceful than you?
 
But the people working excessively also have “excuses” to keep working. “If I don't do it no one will”. “I have to do this because I know it is best for everyone”.
 
A subgroup of “workers” even discussed starving the group to get the weaker ones to leave.  It struck me that no one acts badly when they are happy.  If they were all paired up and in love, then I doubt that conversation would have happened.
 
Even if they got their way and had everyone help with the task that they decided was a priority, they would still find something, some excuse, not to be happy.
 
Happiness is a choice and it needs to come first before any "thing".  Otherwise you will always be chasing it.  Or running away from it. And Sometimes it is difficult to know which direction you are headed.
 
You need to work on yourself, on controlling your mind, otherwise it will control you. And you might not like the person you are when it is out of control.

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Weekend Reading Recommendation

22/1/2017

 
The Icarus Deception by Seth Godin
(Amazon, Kindle, iBooks, Audible)

You are better than they think you are.  Beat the resistance and ship your art.
 
This is a must read if you have even single a bone of creativity left in your body.

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